{"id":2143,"date":"2018-02-19T11:09:22","date_gmt":"2018-02-19T11:09:22","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/wordpress.satellite.mmu.ac.uk\/northernquota-old\/2018\/02\/19\/review-fifty-shades-freed\/"},"modified":"2018-02-19T11:09:22","modified_gmt":"2018-02-19T11:09:22","slug":"review-fifty-shades-freed","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/satellite.mmu.ac.uk\/northernquota-old\/review-fifty-shades-freed\/","title":{"rendered":"Review: Fifty Shades Freed"},"content":{"rendered":"<p style=\"margin: 0px 0px 10.66px;\"><font face=\"Calibri\">There was no doubting it: the final chapter of the Fifty Shades trilogy was going to dominate box offices worldwide. <\/font><\/p>\n<p style=\"margin: 0px 0px 10.66px;\"><font face=\"Calibri\">On release to coincide with Valentine\u2019s day, E. L. James\u2019 erotic trilogy gathered a whopping $38.8m over the weekend of its release in the US, according to Business Insider. <\/font><\/p>\n<p style=\"margin: 0px 0px 10.66px;\"><font face=\"Calibri\">Yet despite the technicalities: it was simply another anti-climax.<\/font><\/p>\n<p style=\"margin: 0px 0px 10.66px;\"><font face=\"Calibri\">It was a tiresome 1h 45m for viewers rich in painful acting, a poor and unnecessary subplot, and the crowd-pleasing soundtrack we hear time and time again but thankfully, now, for the last time.<\/font><\/p>\n<p style=\"margin: 0px 0px 10.66px;\"><font face=\"Calibri\">The blockbuster centres around multi-millionaire newlyweds, sadist Christian Grey (Jamie Dornan) and the faux-girl-next-door Anastasia Steele (Dakota Johnson), kicking off with a brief wedding scene, a few fleeting shots in different honeymoon locations, and Christian whinging at his new wife for exposing her breasts on a topless beach.<\/font><\/p>\n<p style=\"margin: 0px 0px 10.66px;\"><font face=\"Calibri\">This time round, however, it seems the sex wasn\u2019t enough for the brains behind the franchise as we were reintroduced to Anastasia\u2019s psychotic ex-boss Jack Hyde (Eric Johnson). A sickly \u201csurprise! I bought you a mansion\u201d trip around a house on the outskirts of Seattle leads to the couple being unexpectedly involved in a car chase. They zoom away in Christian\u2019s new Audi, cheesy one liners and all, and manage to get away. <\/font><\/p>\n<p style=\"margin: 0px 0px 10.66px;\"><font face=\"Calibri\">One may assume being involved in a relentless car chase would end in tears and crippling anxiety, but not for this swanky pair as they pull up into what looks like Debenhams car park and maul each other in another anti-climactic sex scene that lasts a grand total of 20 seconds.<\/font><\/p>\n<p style=\"margin: 0px 0px 10.66px;\"><font face=\"Calibri\">These scenes, the base for the films and the shock-factor on which many people mustered up interest in the franchise in the first place, resembled those of the Twilight Saga. From perfectly-lit shots of Dornan\u2019s muscular back and Johnson\u2019s side boob, to the wailing renditions of pop hits and the premature husky breaths from Johnson as soon as Dornan lays a single finger on her\u2026 it was cringeworthy.<\/font><\/p>\n<p style=\"margin: 0px 0px 10.66px;\"><font face=\"Calibri\">In parts, it was like watching an episode of The Bill albeit with a more aesthetically pleasing cast; the backing music pumping away like a heartbeat monitor whilst Christian and his security clan discussed Hyde\u2019s antics. Having seen Dornan in roles such as his in The Fall, it\u2019s hard to take him seriously when playing Grey; if you look close enough, the awkwardness is etched away on his face. <\/font><\/p>\n<p style=\"margin: 0px 0px 10.66px;\"><font face=\"Calibri\">If you haven\u2019t read the books, this crime-based subplot will consistently leave you baffled but towards the end of the film we have a classic deus ex machina where viewers finally, lazily, get an explanation for Hyde\u2019s drama \u2013 I for one wasn\u2019t going to accept it as an act of rebellion after Anastasia turned down an office rumble in Fifty Shades Darker.<\/font><\/p>\n<p style=\"margin: 0px 0px 10.66px;\"><font face=\"Calibri\">The movie ends with Ellie Goulding\u2019s \u201cLove Me Like You Do\u201d blaring &#8211; an ode to significant moments within the previous films &#8211; a new haircut for Ana, and a pair of turned-up chinos for Christian. <\/font><\/p>\n<p style=\"margin: 0px 0px 10.66px;\"><font face=\"Calibri\">One thing I can\u2019t deny is that it was easily entertaining; ideal for \u2013 sorry, Foley \u2013 a laugh with your friends. Although, without some food beforehand, it wouldn\u2019t have made for such a noteworthy evening.<\/font><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>There was no doubting it: the final chapter of the Fifty Shades trilogy was going to dominate box offices worldwide. 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